Brigid’s Diary

Before the Ball

My maids were quite shocked at my choice of dress for the ball, but I was resolute.

Most of the designs were quite obviously out of fashion, so they said, and, in my opinion, far too confirming or impractical. Nothing appealed to me until I noticed something in the back of the closet.

It was a simple Grecian gown of pale green Faerie silk, interwoven with tiny golden threads. The bottom half swirled around my waist, while the top flowed over my left shoulder, leaving my right shoulder bare, and trailed behind me to briefly touch the floor. It came with matching gloves that stretched above my elbows and a golden, jewel-encrusted bodice that fitted smugly about my waist. I loved it the first time I saw it. Later, my maids would remind me that it was the gown I wore when I was presented to court.

Genevieve recommended braiding my long copper hair into three braids, interweaving them with a bright golden chain, then looping the arrangement around my head in the unsubtle recognition of my royal lineage. It also emphasized my Fae appearance, which I had some qualms about.

Electra held out my jewelry box, and indicated a large golden collar with brilliant ruby settings, with matching earrings and a large pendant plate dominated by a brilliant carnelian in a cabochon cut. I recognized it as the jewelry worn in the portrait in the parlor. I shook my head to refuse the selection. Instead, I picked through the box to find a long emerald pendant on a golden chain, with matching earrings and bracelet. I dangled the emerald before Electra’s eyes for a moment, then slipped on my selections. And, of course, I wrapped my charm bracelet about the glove on my right wrist.

###

At the Ball

I arrived at the Ball and was announced with the traditional fanfare and titles that was appropriate to my station within this Amber: as the daughter of Princess Fiona, and apparently now the daughter of a Prince as well, I had been granted the title of Duchess, though I rarely used it, but the title of Lady of Hollybrooke Manor was unfamiliar to me.

Dworkin met me when I arrived, and asked me to accompany him to the library. I was disconcerted when he blithely walked through the solid wall to arrive at his destination, when this manner of travel was not instinctual.

He reiterated his pleas for me to dance the Circle, to regain the memories he believed I had lost. I reiterated my own desires to maintain myself as I was.

I inquired of him about the abilities and powers of my Fae form, mindful of one of my mother’s strictures that I had taken to heart: that such Powers unlearned and undisciplined were a danger to their possessor as well as to those around them. Having assumed this Fae seeming, I must now come to terms with its inherent powers, both known and yet to be known, but he refused me with a small display of sadness. If this had been the Amber of my memories, I believe that he would have turned my request into an inducement to dance the Circle, yet he did not. Ultimately, I must discover these powers on my own and in my own way.

Finally, we remained at the same impasse we started at, and I took my leave of him. As if to make my point, I used the door to leave the library.

###

Meeting Brand

When I had seen the grand parade and production that accompanied Mother’s arrival, I took refuge in the library. It was there that I discovered my uncle Brand, glancing through the shelves. Looking at him, I forced myself to remember that this was not the Brand whom I was told had tried to murder Benedict and Martin and tried to set himself as ruler of a new Pattern. Even then, I somehow could not bring myself to trust him. Perhaps, on retrospect, because of my Fae nature or my knowledge of the true Amber, I was seeing something in him that was invisible to the others.

He was aware of the situation in general, even though he asked me to explain it to him in greater detail. He was especially interested in the predicament in which I found myself, caught between the mortal world and the world of the Fae.

When I was finished my explanation, he seemed almost pleased at my discomfort. It was not the reaction that I would have expected, given the sympathy that I had received from my other relatives.

Truth to be told, seeing his reaction, I fled the library and Brand’s presence; I was so disconcerted that I walked through the wall of the library to escape him. I hurried to Dworkin to tell him of my encounter.

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